Friday, December 30, 2005

Traffic Lights !

From behind the sheet metal and glass, he observed the people around him. He saw the stooping old lady cross the street at snail's place much to the dismay of all the vehicles turning right. He wondered what the Hummer would have done to the lady, if it weren't illegal to run over the people, especially the really old ones. He saw a 5 year old kid trailing his mom as she pushed the perambulator in which lie her second kid. He felt like screaming to the 5 year old, "Dude hurry up, you don't have for ever to cross the road...can't you see the Hand has stopped flashing." But her mom trudged oblivious to the signs. She was a firm believer of the law that pedesterians have the right of way, but she forgot that a busy road is not a playground for a toddler.

Tic Toc, Tic Toc....the rythmic beat of his indicator reminded him that he was in the left-turn lane only. He glanced over his shoulder. He saw an elderly chinese couple arguing in an animated fashion. The husand seemed to be giving a patient ear, as the lady vented her spleen out (probably in Mandarin). But he was not peeved by their arguement, rather he was irritated that they drove a better car than him - a Lexus. As he looked into his rear view mirror, he saw this pretty girl putting on her lipstick, probably on her way to some hot date, or just a girls gone wild Friday night party. He muttered, "Make up your mind, not your face girl...you are on 4-laned street not in your beauty parlour". But he was having fun observing people around, and he decided that he would write a blog about it when he returns home. He thought observing people and their antics was more amusing than the wild animals he had observed at the zoo recently.

He then stared straight ahead. He saw a handsome looking guy wearing a suit sitting high in his Porsche Cayenne. As he waited for the signal, the man seemed to be fiddling with his blackberry. Damn these bankers and consultants, hot air and heavy head, too much of money, he thought. Then he glanced at the coffee shop at the intersection - Starbucks (no points for guessing). There was this lady in a formal attire, punching vigorously at the keys of her laptop. There were 3 kids doing homework and discussing about their History professor. And then he pitied the scores of other people sitting outsided the shop who had shelved out 4 bucks for a cold tasteless latte. He couldn't agree more with Seinfeld, Starbucks should actually be renamed Fourbucks.

As he kept fiddling with his radio stations, he hit upon a station playing, 'Oceans breathe salty' by Modest Mouse - one of his favourties. As he dabbled with the equaliser to get the best of the song, he heard a shrill honk from behind. His left turn light had turned green. He looked back at the girl who honked him and screamed, 'What's the hurry bit$% ?'.

With one hand on the wheel, and the other on the gear stick, he revved up his car and took a left turn onto the ramp to the 805 freeway. As he effortlessly shifted his gears, he could see the needle in the speedometer reach the max permissible speed in seconds. But alas, he had forgotten to carefully merge into the next lane. The last thing he remembered wast the 18 wheeler big rig nudge him out of his lane, as his car catapulted over the railing and into the ditch. His dream of writing a blog about his observations died when his fuel tank leaked and his car burst into flames.....but someone passing by on the freeway observed it and decided to write about it !!

3 comments:

Anarkist said...

Nice typical pointy post. The whole Starbucks thing just there to inflict another PJ on us. Strange that you credit Senifield with it. At the risk of taking a "cheap potshot", I distinctly remember you claiming it as your original.
BTW, how did our man know that the kids were discussing about their history professor, from his car across the intersection?
PS: I think the Mustang is better than the Lexus.

totti said...

Heee Heee..mudit has already done the damage...Happy New Year..you guys (cartman style) :p

how do i add an image as a comment?

Point 5 said...

@Anarkist....Seinfeld is my guru man...I shall never plagiarise his stuff...Thanx for ur PS...but do check out the Lexus IS 350...fastest sedan in its class...

@Totti...Happy new year to you too