Breaking the Ice

Have you ever been stuck in an elevator with a complete stranger and felt an urge to start a conversation. I have observed that people start conversations under such situations not to befriend the other person or to keep themselves occupied, but to escape the pregnant silence prevailing between them. Everytime I am stuck in such a situation, I think about ways to start a friendly chat - depending on the speed of the elevator and my creativity, I would say I have achieved a moderate success in this regards.

This behaviour can be extended to other scenarios like cab ride, hair cut etc. However, cab rides are a little easier as experience suggests me that 80% of cab drivers are garrulous and will start talking even before you close the cab door. Barbershops are a little tricky though, cause you dont want to distract the barber with your ramblings and get a scissor stuck in your ear rather than their words. Besides the humming of those blades make the communication a little harder.

I have always found 'weather' as a very easy topic of conversation. For example, in Pennsylvania the weather is very unpredictable and really bad for most part of the year. So on bad days, you can lament about the cold snowy weather or the thunderstorms and yearn for nice sunny days. On the other hand, when you do have your sunshine, start heaping praises on it talk about the welcome relief from the wet days. Things are however a bit different in Southern California because it never rains, the temperature is in 70s throughout the year, and you have clear blue skies and plenty of sunshine. So what do you do ? Well, tell them that you moved from Pennsylvania about a month ago and start complaining about the horrible weather up Northeast.

If the stranger happens to be a guy, then sports and cars seem to be very easy topic of conversation. If you are in Philadelphia start talking about Eagles, if you are in Los Angeles talk about the Lakers. It doesn't matter if it's not football season, most people are rather fanatical, and very knowledgeable, about their local teams and welcome discussion regarding them all year around. You dont even have to be knowledgeable about that particular sport, just know the name of the team and say, "So how are the Lakers doing this year ?".....and they will yap till the elevator reaches your floor, or the cab rolls to your stop. Most guys are also very passionate about their cars. They can tell you the exact number of horses under the hood of Mazda 6, or the insurance rate of a Boxster, or the 0-60 of a corvette. Unlike sports, you need a little literacy in this respect to prolong a conversation.

Sports and Cars sounds like a definite no-no when it comes to ladies, though I have surely talked to some ladies about their alma-mater's football team. I think it's always easier to get them started on themselves - their pet, their job, their neighbourhood etc. Just feed in a few keywords, pretend that you are interested and shut off your brains, as they will keep yapping. Talking about travel and different places could also be a possibility.

But I am still confused why we put efforts to break the ice, when we have no genuine interest whatsoever to know about the other person. Is it just human nature that we can't stand extended periods of silence while in a stranger's company ?